Roy Hinkley, or “The Professor” (Driver +1, Cyclist, Gunner +1, Trucker, Computer +2, Tech +2, Weapons Tech +4) as he is known by the Marauders of Ballard, OK (see map #9 for more details), is a master weapon-smith. A former employee of Uncle Albert, Roy was actively recruited by the Marauders to relocate from Uncle Albert’s Texas headquarters to Ballard, OK.
In exchange for funding his research, the Professor builds remotely piloted car bombs for the Marauders as well as some other interesting weapons packages. In his spare time, The Professor also refurbishes the gang’s weapons and still works on weapons development. After Uncle Albert bought out Uncle Schmalbert, Roy began trying to make functional versions of the weapons popularized on Uncle Schmal’s Saturday morning cartoon. He is continuing to work on these weapons in Ballard.
(DM Notes: It is up to you if the Professor has any of these weapons mounted in his test vehicle and if he has installed any on a Marauder’s combat vehicle)
All weapons listed are PROTOTYPES and UNOFFICIAL. Please roll a D6 before rolling to hit. For continued use of the prototypes, Every 10 successful (4-5) firings of the weapon, a +1 is added to your test firing roll. In your campaign, 40 successful firings make the weapon available to anyone in Ballard, OK.
1 – Critical Failure – Effects happen to firing vehicle
2 – Complete Failure – Weapon does not fire and short circuits all electronics in the vehicle (including Electric Power Plants)
3 – Weapon Failure – Weapon does not fire and takes two turns to reset
4 or 5 – Successful Firing – Weapon works as described.
6 – Miscalculated Power – Weapon works but does double listed damage (counts as a successful firing for testing purposes)
The Black Hole Dropper – The ultimate in garbage disposals!
Want a dropped weapon with real punch? The Black Hole Dropper really gets rid of the road trash!
Black Hole Dropper (BHD) — $15,000, 250lbs., 3 spaces, 3 DP. 3 shots ($2,000 and 20 lbs. each). Loaded cost $21,000, loaded weight 310lbs.; loaded magazine costs $6,050 and weighs 75lbs.
Burst effect. The BHD swallows everything in a 2.5″ radius, including the ground. The BHD drops what looks like a mine counter and can be set to go off like a regular mine or set with a time delay. Remember to give yourself ample time to get out of its range before it goes off. It is also an effective roadblock; it creates a 5″ diameter, 2.5″ deep hole in the road.
Note: This device is highly illegal in areas that don’t allow road-damaging weapons.
From Uncle Albert’s Catalog from Hell 2042
Dr. Deathwish’s Patented Armor Remover – The next best thing to Universal Solvent.
Each bottle is guaranteed to remove 100 lbs. of plastic armor or other plastics (like body armor and clothing).
Great for practical jokes! Can also be used in Paint Sprayers.
Armor Remover (AR) -$25, 1 GE per bottle. Dissolves 100 lbs. of plastic armor at 10 lbs. per minute.
A paint sprayer (PS) can use this ($100 to modify the sprayer; $200 to modify an HDPS) PSAR – 10 shots ($50 and 4lbs. each). HDPSAR – 10 shots ($100 and 8 lbs. each).
A cloud of solvent will last for 5 turns before dispersing, and looks like a normal paint cloud. Any vehicle driving through it loses 10lbs. of armor (Check your weight per point for your vehicle type) on each exposed side (including wheelguards, armored hubs and EWP armor) for each phase it remains in the cloud. Body armor disintegrates at 1 point per phase in the cloud.
NBC suits are not affected by AR.
Metal Armor is not affected by AR.
Plastic armor composited under Metal Armor is NOT affected unless Metal Armor has taken breach damage.
From Uncle Albert’s Catalog from Hell 2042
Existential Blue Crayon Gun
This weapon fires existential blue crayons, a strange color of blue that no one has ever been able to describe. No one knows for certain why the EBCG works the way it does, but one theory postulates that the crayons cause the armor to become extremely depressed.
Existential Blue Crayon Gun (EBCG) — To hit 8, $6,000, 250 lbs., 2 spaces, 1 DP. 1d-3 damage (always at least 1 point of damage), 10 shots ($10 and 5 lbs. each). Loaded cost $6,100, loaded weight 300 lbs.; loaded magazine costs $150 and weighs 65 lbs. Area effect.
No more than two EBCGs can be linked together.
The damage caused by the gun bypasses armor and goes to internal components immediately. If the target is unarmored, double the damage caused.
From Uncle Albert’s Catalog from Hell 2042
Photon Torpedoes – Mr. Sulu arm the Photon Torpedo!
The ultimate in weaponry.
Photon Torpedo (PT) – To hit 11, $30,000, 750lbs., 5 spaces, 6 DP, damage as below, one-shot weapon. Burst effect. Due to the power source of the photon torpedo, if the target vehicle is missed, the photon torpedo will continue in a straight line at 100 mph until it hits something. Anything (Trees, Buildings, Pedestrians, Parked Vehicles)
A PT destroys anything it hits, blowing the target to confetti (use the confetti rule).
If it hits a large (larger than 2″x2″) target, it makes a 2″x2″ hole/breach.
In addition, everything within 2″ takes 5d damage and all characters must roll as if hit by a concussion grenade. Everything within 4″ takes 2d damage.
From Uncle Albert’s Catalog from Hell 2042
Nuclear Power Plant
For those who want real power!
Sneer at recharging stations! Cruise practically forever; one power rod lasts a whole year!
Warning: We cannot be held responsible for reactor-, shielding-, cooling- or any other kind of systems failure. Look at it this way — if it malfunctions, you won’t be worrying about it.
Nuclear Power Plant — $500,000, 2,500 lbs., 14 spaces. 20,000 power factors, 200 mph maximum top speed. Modifications are required to the wheel motors to take the extra strain — $1,000 per wheel.
If the vehicle has 2x as many power factors as weight, acceleration is 20 mph. If it has 3x or more as many power factors as it has weight, acceleration is 25 mph.
The power plant as a whole is considered to have 10 DP of metal armor around it. Inside the power plant are several components, each with its own 4 DP. Each component also has its own side effects if damaged. If the external container is breached, roll 1d6 to determine the affected component:
1 = Reactor Core,
2 = Heat Exchangers,
3 = Generators,
4 = Cooling System,
5 = Radiator Fins,
6 = Nothing Important.
Once the DP of a component is destroyed, the system in question malfunctions as listed.
- Reactor Core — Power factors drop to 0 immediately.
All occupants of the vehicle are killed by lethal radiation; a radiation suit is no protection.
Creates radiation in a 4″ radius from the vehicle (2″ if the vehicle has metal armor, 8″ if the vehicle has no Side or Top armor).
Radiation effects are equal to Tertiary Radius effects described in Car Wars Tanks, p. 43.
Repairing a Reactor Core Failure is not possible. - Heat Exchangers — Power factors decrease by 1,000 per turn (the truck plant loses 1,000 lbs. of maximum hauling capacity per turn) until it reaches 0.
If the reactor is not completely shut down within 30 minutes (starting up or shutting down a nuclear power plant takes 20 minutes), it will overheat with the same results as if the Reactor Core were destroyed, as above. - Generators — Power factors decrease by 1,000 per minute (the truck plant loses 1,000 lbs. of maximum hauling capacity per minute) until reaching 0. No other effects.
- Cooling System — No power loss, but dangerous overheating.
If the plant is not completely shut down in 30 minutes, as described under Heat Exchangers, the plant goes to Reactor Core Failure, as detailed in component 1 above. - Radiator Fins — These are large steel plates and can’t really be hurt. They just absorb 4 DP of damage.
- Nothing Important — Lots of idiot lights flash and nuclear engineers suffer nervous breakdowns, but nothing serious happens.
Due to the limited amount of shielding that can be carried, it is suggested that all personnel stay at least 10″/50 yards away from the power plant for more than 2 hours per day unless wearing a radiation suit or NBC shielding. Refueling is required once a year whether the power plant is used or not. New fuel rods cost $1,000 (or more) per recharge (availability is up to the referee) and a radiation suit is required to live through the refueling procedure.
All repairs to a Nuclear Power Plant are Very Hard and cost 20 times normal cost.
Nuclear Truck Power Plant
Cross-country endurance like you never saw before! Haul along an extra driver or two, a galley and a sleeping berth, stock up the fridge, and you don’t have to stop until you roll out the cargo!
Nuclear Truck Power Plant – $1,000,000, 6,000 lbs., 20 spaces, 6 DP per component and 17 points of metal armor shielding. 100,000-1b. maximum rig weight, top speed 130 mph, acceleration 5 mph/turn up to 25 mph, 10 mph/turn thereafter.
This plant has much better shielding than the normal nuclear power plant — characters can spend any amount of time around it without radiation suits unless the shielding is breached. Damage to the plant is figured as for a normal nuclear plant, above, except that the truck plant has 17 DP of metal armor for shielding, and each component has 6 DP.
Radiation Suit
For those who want the raw power of a nuclear power plant, but don’t want to glow in the dark.
Radiation Suit — $500, no GE. A Rad Suit can be armored, giving it the protection of body armor and the restrictions of IBA.
Armored IBA Radiation Suit – $2,500.
All Nuclear Equipment From Uncle Albert’s Catalog from Hell 2042
The Invisible Grenades and Launchers .
“Invisible” Grenades (IG) — Adds $175 to the cost of each grenade and +1 GE when carried.
The Professor has gotten his hands on military cloaking technology. He is adapting it for vehicular and weapons usage. The vehicle cloak is still in the early development stage, however cloaking is in prototype for hand grenades. Any Grenade type can be cloaked for the additional cost and it will be double-sized. Standard rules for each grenade variant apply.
Since these are in prototype, the following additional rules for (IG). Roll 1 D6, on a ‘6’ the cloak fails and the grenade is treated with a standard grenade counter. If the cloak holds, the REF and ONLY the ref knows where the grenade lands using the Grenade miss rules: (From the Car Wars compendium Rules)
Any grenade toss that is less than the best possible (a 12), will deviate from the intended target This deviation has two components – Direction and Distance Or, to put it another way, which way did it go, and how badly did you miss?
Grenade Direction Table
Roll 1 die, and consult the following:
1 – Off to the right
2 – Off to the left
3 – On line, but short
4 – On line, but long
5 – Off to the right, and long or short (roll randomly)
6 – Off to the left and long or short (roll randomly)
Grenade Distance Table
How far the grenade lands from the intended spot depends on how badly you missed your to-hit roll
If your grenade was both off line and long/ short, roll separately for each distance
Made your roll or higher but rolled less than 12 – 1d−3 1/4” squares in each direction called for by the direction roll
Missed by 1 – 1d−1 (treat a 0 result as 1) squares in each direction called for
Missed by 2 – 1d+1 squares in each direction called for
Missed by 3 – 2d−2 (treat a 0 result as 1) squares in each direction called for
Missed by 4 or 5 – 2d+3 squares in each direction called for
Missed by 6 or more – 3d squares (8 squares minimum) in each specified direction
Auto-Grenade Launcher for Invisible Grenades (AGLfIG)
NEW MILITARY SURPLUS!
To hit 7, $5,000, 250 lbs., 3 spaces, 3 DP; damage by grenade type,
holds 10 invisible grenades (cost by grenade type + $20, 10lbs. each). Loaded weight 350 lbs.; loaded magazine costs $50 plus the cost of grenades and weighs 115 lbs.
Different grenade types may be mixed in the magazine and fired in any order desired; rotary magazine effects are included in the price of the unit.
The AGLfIG can fire one or two grenades in one firing action. All grenades must be fired at the same target, and all grenades in a salvo use the same to-hit roll to determine the amount of scatter, but each grenade scatters separately.
For example, if a two-shot salvo misses its to-hit roll by 3, then each grenade scatters 2d-2 squares in a random direction.
The maximum range on an AGLfIG is 300″. AGLfIG ammunition cannot be fired in any other AGL or GL. Because of the modifications needed to fire IG non-IG grenades cannot be fired from the AGLfIG.
The AGLfIG can be used for indirect fire (see Car Wars Tanks, pp. 32-34).
“Invisible” Grenade Launcher (IGL) — To hit 7
$1,000, 200 lbs., 2 spaces, 2 DP; damage by grenade type,
holds 5 invisible grenades IG (cost by IG type, 8 lbs. per grenade); loaded weight 240 lbs.; loaded magazine costs $50 plus the cost of the grenades and weighs 55 lbs.
Different grenade types can be mixed in the magazine, but the player must keep strict track of the order in which they are loaded.
The maximum range on the IGL is 75″, and it can be used for indirect fire (see Car Wars Tanks, pp. 32-34).
Grenade types and effects are listed in Uncle Albert’s Catalogue from Hell, Personal Equipment section, pp. 133-135.
Because of the modifications needed to fire IG non-IG grenades cannot be fired from the IGL
Invisible Grenades suggested by Robert Cester
Ballbearing Dropper (BBD) — $100, 25 lbs., 1 space, 4 DP;
10 shots ($20 and 5 lbs. each). Loaded cost $300, loaded weight 75 lbs.;
loaded magazine costs $250 and weighs 65 lbs.
Each shot contains 5 lbs. of 2″ (actual not scale size) copper/beryllium ball bearings that will bounce for 5 seconds in the drop area (until we have made a ball bearing counter, please use an oil slick counter).
While bouncing, the ball bearings will do 1 D6 damage to exposed side and under armor every phase a vehicle is within 1/2″ of the counter and 2 D6 to under armor every phase the vehicle is on top of the counter until has passed out of range of the counter. Ball bearings do not affect tires or metal armor. If a Pedestrian survives an attack by the BBD please follow the same rules for running over the counter.
Once they have stopped bouncing the ball bearings become a D1 hazard to 4-6 wheeled vehicles; a D2 hazard to motorcycles and trikes, 10-wheel vehicles and larger are unaffected by non-bouncing ball bearings.
If a pedestrian is dumb enough to run into a counter of non-bouncing ball bearings roll a D6
1 or 2; stumbles, loses 2 squares of speed this turn.
3 or 4; major stumble, loses 2 squares of speed this turn and next
5 or 6; fall pedestrian rolls for 2 squares and comes to a complete stop. Takes 1 point of damage (but cannot be killed by the fall). The Pedestrian takes 1 turn to stand back up. and 1 more turn to begin running again. All carried items are dropped and scattered unless the pedestrian is wearing a backpack.
Ball Bearing Dropper suggested by Robert Cester
The Radar “Jam”mer (RJ) – To Hit 9 – $3,500, 45 lbs., 3 spaces, 4 DP –
25 shots ($10 and 5 lbs. each). Loaded cost $3,750, loaded weight 170 lbs.;
loaded magazine costs $300 and weighs 140 lbs.
When active this combination unit takes care of normal radar and blocks any attempt to acquire that vehicle (no roll for trikes, 1-5 for 4-6 wheelers, 1-4 for 10 wheel and larger, cannot be mounted on motocycles). The RJ detects incoming radar signals and sounds an alarm when enemy radar locks on to the vehicle. It gives the bearing of the enemy unit and can distinguish between normal tracking radar and missile-homing radar. It can be linked to a chaff dispenser or other weapon for instant screening, for the usual linkage costs.
The RJ blocks radar aimed at the vehicle with a successful roll for each attempt to pick up the vehicle’s location on radar, and each attempt to target it with radar-guided weaponry. RGMs and radar-based ATADs cannot target the vehicle if the roll is made.
The RJ drains 1 power unit per minute while in use, and the vehicle cannot use any radar-guided weaponry or devices while it is on. Turning the RJ on or off counts as a firing action.
All of this is great and is pretty standard for any off the shelf radar jammer. It is exactly what you would expect when dealing with ground-based or vehicular radar attempting to acquire your vehicle outside of normal combat weapons range. But what about when the radar is being used in combat to help target your vehicle? That is when the RJ shines.
When in combat range, if active when combat starts, if radar is detected, the RJ will fire a stream of raspberry jam at the radar equipped vehicle. A successful hit will cover the radar emitter rendering it useless until it is cleaned off, as well as any windows or windshields facing the RJ nozzle, hampering driver or gunner visibility until the jam is cleaned off. Windshield wipers will take 10 seconds to remove all the jam.
If the to hit roll is missed (Use the grenade miss rules to determine placement, except a hit is hit) the RJ creates a 1″x1/2″ raspberry jam slick. Any hazard suffered or maneuver performed while on raspberry jam adds D2 to the difficulty.
The Radar “Jam”mer was suggested by Shawn Irvine
The Radar “Jam”mer Jammer (RJJ) – To Hit 11 – $4,000, 45 lbs., 3 spaces, 4 DP – 25 shots ($10 and 8 lbs. each). Loaded cost $4,250, loaded weight 195 lbs.; loaded magazine costs $300 and weighs 165 lbs.
The RJJ does everything the RJ does. Except in combat. Then it is strictly a counter measure against the RJ. If active at the beginning of the combat round the RJJ will detect when a RJ is fired and launch an 8 lb. ball of peanut butter at the stream of raspberry jam. With a successful to hit roll, the peanut butter negates the raspberry jam and 1″x1/2″ PB&J counter is deposited halfway between the two vehicles. This counter is delicious but is an additional D2 difficulty to any maneuver performed on it. If the to hit roll misses use the grenade miss rules to place a 1″x1/2″ peanut butter counter. Peanut butter by itself is only a D1 hazard to trikes and motorcycles.
Turning the RJJ on or off counts as one firing action.
The Radar “Jam”mer Jammer was suggested by Shawn Irvine
The A.L.V.I.N. (Air Launched Vehicular Intercept Neotamias) system, bazookas that fire enraged rodents, Neotamias obscurus, (the California chipmunk) who, in their final, tragic kamikaze dive, sing out “Witch Doctor”, songs about harmonicas and Christmas being late.
Should only be launched at open windows or breached armor for driver distraction. A singing chipmunk isn’t much use against metal or plastic armor.
The A.L.V.I.N. Vehicular Bazooka (AVB) — To hit 9, $2,000, 200lbs., 2 spaces, 2 DP; Loaded cost $2,600 loaded weight 205 lbs.; No damage to vehicles but there is an additional D1 hazard when successfully shot into breached armor due to the driver being distracted (VERY EFFECTIVE against motorcycles). Pedestrians without body armor suffer 1 point of biting damage (Max 2 points) each round the chipmunk is still attached to their person. The only action said pedestrian can accomplish is removing the chipmunk (1 attempt per turn. Must roll a 5 or 6 on one D6), A successful hit without breached armor results in a bloody smear with no damage accrued to the vehicle.
The AVB is a single shot weapon. Each shot ($600 0.2 lbs and 1GE) needs to be loaded just before combat and cannot be stored in the weapon. The AVB takes two seconds to reload (1 second to get Chipmunk out the cage and 1 second to reload the AVP).
Single shot weapon must be reloaded after every fire
The A.L.V.I.N. Bazooka (AB) — To hit 10, $1,500, 4 GE, No damage to vehicles but there is an additional D1 hazard when successfully shot into breached armor due to the driver being distracted (VERY EFFECTIVE against motorcycles). Pedestrians without body armor suffer 1 point of biting damage (Max 2 points) each round the chipmunk is still attached to their person. The only action said pedestrian can accomplish is removing the chipmunk (1 attempt per turn. Must roll a 5 or 6 on one D6), A successful hit without breached armor results in a bloody smear with no damage accrued to the vehicle.
Single shot weapon, extra rounds 1 GE and CPS $600 each. The AB takes two seconds to reload (1 second to get Chipmunk out the backpack cage and 1 second to reload the AP).
A missed to hit roll by either weapon results in a chipmunk counter being placed on the map following the rules for a grenade miss. This chipmunk will run to the nearest pedestrian at 25 mph (pedestrian movement rules. A chipmunk can actually run at 21 mph, I rounded up) and annoy that pedestrian.
Vehicle-mounted Chipmunk Cage (VCC) $2,000, 200 lbs., 4 spaces, 2 DP
Holds 10 Singing Chipmunks. When VCC is destroyed any surviving SC will scamper around the interior of the vehicle causing a D1 hazard for every 2 SC.
Backpack Chipmunk Cage (BCC) $500, 20 lbs.,
Holds 5 Singing Chipmunks. When BCC is destroyed any surviving SC will scamper to the nearest (not the carrier) pedestrian to begin singing to them.
Singing Chipmunk (SC) – ($600, 0.2 lbs, and 1GE, 1 DP) Can be kept as a pet and costs as additional $150/year in food and maintenance.
The A.L.V.I.N. system was suggested by Michael Barry
-Credits-
The Black Hole Dropper, Dr. Deathwish’s Patented Armor Remover, Existential Blue Crayon Gun, Nuclear Power Plant, Nuclear Truck Power Plant, Photon Torpedoes and Radiation Suit are by Steve Peters of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Autoduel Association of Allentown PA originally published in ADQ Vol 5 #1 and reprinted in Uncle Albert’s Catalog from Hell (c) SJGames [UACfH]
The Invisible Grenade and Launchers & Ballbearing Dropper were suggested by Robert Cester and statted out by Steve Nibbelink. Stats were based on Grenade Launcher and Grenade rules as presented in UACfH for the IG, AGLfIG, and IGL.
The Radar “Jam”mer and Radar “Jam”mer Jammer were suggested by Shawn Irvine and statted out by Steve Nibbelink. Stats were based on the Oil Jet, Radar Detector and Radar Jammer from UACfH
The A.L.V.I.N. system was suggested by Michael Barry and statted out by Steve Nibbelink. Stats were based on Rocket Launcher, Bazooka and Grenade rules as presented in UACfH.
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*PLEASE NOTE* This supplemental information was written for Car Wars 1st – 4th Edition rules and game play.
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